


Turning Page

by simplyollie



Series: Nostalgia [2]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Flashbacks, Fluff, Getting Together, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-29
Updated: 2018-11-29
Packaged: 2019-09-01 12:59:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16765633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/simplyollie/pseuds/simplyollie
Summary: He found himself curled around her body, his fingers combing through her hair as he breathed in her scent, a content smile taking over his face. This was the kind of thing he had dreamed of; the two of them, lying together at night, just basking in each others comfort.He only hoped that when he woke up the next morning, everything would still be there.





	Turning Page

> _Before_

* * *

It was small things he noticed at first.

Like the way her hair fell into her face after too many hours of paperwork, a frustrated sigh leaving her lips as she rifled through her draws for a hair tie. Spencer would watch with concealed fascination as Emily tied her hair back, resulting in an effortless perfect pony tail that would swing lazily at the nape of her neck as she continued to work on her files. He'd find himself glancing up every now and then, his lips twitching slightly as she toyed with the loose strands behind her ears, unsure as to when he became so interested in his co-worker's hair.

Over the course of the next few weeks, Spencer began to find his eyes continuously roaming towards Emily's desk, watching the way she moved and acted when she thought nobody was watching. He noticed the way her lips would jut out into an almost pout whenever she was concentrated enough, a small crinkle forming between her eyebrows as she lent forward to examine her file more closely. He was immediately drawn to the way she'd sometimes twirl her pen when she was bored, the writing utensil falling to her desk before she picked it up again, trying to perfect the trick she had been slowly teaching herself over time. 

Almost every day, when Spencer would get up to grab his third cup of coffee that morning, Emily would ask him if he could refill hers as well. He had always accepted, never really paying too much mind to it. However, after his surprising new revelation on his co-worker, he began to eagerly anticipate the moment he'd get up to grab a refill, contentedly reaching out to grab Emily's mug on his way over. And if his fingers happened to brush against hers every now and then, well, none of them said anything about it. 

Hotch much have noticed a change in the duos dynamic - what it was Spencer had no idea - but he began to pair them together more often on cases. Spencer reveled in the way it felt to bounce ideas back and forth with Emily, twin grins enveloping their features whenever they both came to the same conclusion. Morgan began to tease the pair about the way they finished each others sentences, waggling his eyebrows mockingly at the two whenever they said the same thing at the same time. Spencer pretended to ignore the blush on cheeks, and the warmth in his chest when he saw Emily trying to hide her own. 

As these interactions carried on, Spencer feigned ignorance towards the feelings that had began to develop in the pit of his stomach. He disregarded the way his breath would hitch ever so slightly when he caught her eye and she smiled sweetly at him. He pushed down the butterflies in his stomach whenever her hand came to rest on his shoulder, and acted like he didn't feel himself melting subtly into the touch. 

Nonetheless, he couldn't ignore these feelings forever - and this notion was proven the night after a particularly bad case, over two mugs of cold tea while War and Peace played in the background. 

* * *

Four dead bodies. All males and in their early twenties. All overdosed on diladid.

Spencer felt the teams eyes on him throughout the entire case, everyone of his team members waiting for him to break, give into the temptation and break his sobriety. He didn't though, and he knew he wouldn't. He kept up a professional front throughout the entire case, even coming across a major break that helped them crack the case.

When he got back home, however, it was a different story.

It was midnight and Spencer was pacing the entirety of his apartment, hands shaking at his sides as he willed his mind to just _stop._ He would sit on his couch for a while, flicking through channels and fidgeting in his spot before deciding the history channel wasn't going to help. He would go back to pacing, his hands coming up to tug painfully at his hair, trying to use the light pain as a distraction from the cravings raging through him. He had long since given up on sleep, knowing his thoughts and craze for the drug would keep him up. At one point he had even sprawled himself across the floor of his kitchen, the cool tiles pressing into his bare back as he lay there in nothing but a pair of flannel pajama pants. 

It was 2am when Spencer left the apartment, not thinking too much about where he was going, just letting his shaking legs carry him through the streets of Virginia. By the time he realized where he was he had already knocked loudly on the white wooden door. Realization flitted through Spencer's face and he was about to turn around, make his way back to his cold, dark, and lonely apartment, when the door opened. 

"Spence?" 

* * *

When the urgent knock sounded on Emily Prentiss' door at 2:25a.m., she was confused.

She hadn't been able to sleep and was about to put on War and Peace and allow herself to eventually doze on her couch as the familiar movie played in the background. The movie had just started when the knock sounded, the fist pounding insistently against the door before suddenly stopping. A small frown enveloped her face as she made her way to the safe, quickly grabbing her gun and cautiously stepping towards the door. When she looked through the peephole, however, she didn't expect to see Spencer Reid standing there.

Setting her gun down, Emily immediately opened the door, startling Spencer as he stared at her with wide eyes. He looked confused and slightly dazed, his hands shaking at his sides. His hair was a tangled mess atop his head and his eyes were red rimmed and puffy.

"Spence?" she asked cautiously, her lip twitching up into a sad smile. 

Spencer's eyes met hers and his lips promptly began to tremble, tears filling his dazed, hazel eyes. 

"I'm sorry," he whispered brokenly, tugging at Emily's heart. "I - I don't - I didn't know w-where else to go." 

A few tears trailed down his cheeks, and he reached up to hastily wipe them away, his throat clenched as he tried his hardest to hold in a sob. Emily's chest ached as she watched the strong man before her beginning to fall apart. She reached out, pulling him inside and closing the door behind them. As soon as she had locked it, she turned back to Spencer just as a few more tears escaped his eyes, and pushing past the feelings deep inside of her, she pulled him into a tight hug. The minute her arms were around him he wrapped his arms around her back, pulling her as close to him as possible before promptly bursting into tears. 

"It's okay," she soothed, rubbing her hand up and down his shaking back. "It's gonna be okay." 

She felt Spencer shake his head, a choked off sob escaping his lips as he buried his head further into the crook of her neck. 

Tightening her grip on him, Emily reached up with hand and began to run it through his hair, shushing him lightly as his sobs became more frantic. "I promise you, Spencer, it _will_ be okay. It might not feel like it now, but I promise you it will." 

They stood in the entrance hallway for a while, holding each other intently, as if the other was going to suddenly disappear the minute they separated. Roughly ten minutes had passed when Spencer's sobs died down, his fingers toying with the ends of her hair as he tried to get his breathing under control. Emily didn't say anything, just kept her arms around him and tried to push down the growing warmth at the feeling of Spencer's fingers on her hair. When Spencer eventually pulled back, his face a deep and blotchy red, Emily ignored the empty feeling at the loss of contact. Instead, she wordlessly grabbed his hand and led him to the living room, settling him on the couch before making her way to the kitchen. Leaning against the counter, waiting for the kettle to boil, Emily studied the back of Spencer's head, watching how tense he appeared as he rested the side of his head on his shoulder. His hair was a mess and she longed to run her fingers through it again, to cup his cheeks in her hands, to hold him close to her and never let go. 

_But you can't do that, so stop imagining it._

Emily scolded herself, turning her back to Spencer and focusing on making the tea. Spencer needed her. He had come to her at his most vulnerable - _her_ not JJ, or Morgan, _her_ \- and she couldn't mess that up. She couldn't take advantage of him in this state. Instead, she'd just suck it up and be there for her friend, because he needed someone to tell him that it was going to be okay, that he wasn't alone, and she was going to be that someone. 

* * *

Spencer jumped when Emily deposited the steaming mugs on the coffee table before them, curling in on himself subtly. Now that he'd had a chance to get all of his emotions out he felt an overwhelming sense of embarrassment. Why had he come here? Why had he let Emily see that? She wasn't supposed to - nobody was - the only person who'd seen him break down like that was Morgan - and that didn't really count because he was half out of his mind, in the throes of withdrawal. 

Silently, Emily sat down beside him, their knees just barely touching as she leaned back into the couch, her eyes fixated on the TV screen before them. Spencer stared at her for a while, his eyes flicking up and down her frame, trying to understand what her intentions were. Satisfied with his own observations, he reached out and grabbed his own mug, holding it tightly in his hands as he settled back into the cushions. He sipped lazily at his tea, his gaze flitting back and forth between War and Peace and the woman beside him. She seemed so relaxed, so casual, not at all the way she appeared in the office and on cases. She wasn't wearing any make up either, but Spencer found she looked just as beautiful as when she did - maybe even more. Spencer didn't know what came over him, but he suddenly felt the urge to pull her close to him and let her wrap her arms around him. Ignoring the warning bells going off in his head, after he had set down his mug, Spencer relaxed back into the couch and rested his head on her shoulder. She stiffened at first, but then all the tension drained from her body and she rested her own head atop of his, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and pulling him closer to him. 

They didn't speak at all, just watched the movie in silence, basking in the warmth of each others bodies. Neither of them moved until the credits began to roll around 5:30a.m. When Emily got up to shut the movie off, Spencer found himself yearning to touch her again, to keep her close and never let go. Instead of ignoring his feelings, he reached forward, grasping his hand in hers and pulling her back onto the couch. 

"Emily," he whispered as she fell back onto the couch. 

She looked up at him expectantly, her eyes wide and unreadable. His eyes flicked down to her mouth, and before he could stop himself, he leaned forward, capturing her lips in his. She responded almost right away, her lips working against his as her hands came up to rest in his hair. Spencer moved his hands to her waist, pulling her as close to him as possible until she was practically sitting in his lap. Her lips were hot, heavy, and desperate against his, and Spencer couldn't hold back his content as he smiled into the kiss. Eventually, they broke apart for air, both breathing heavily and refusing to look anywhere but at each other.

"What was that for?" Emily asked, a shy smirk on her lips as she brushed a few strands of his hair away from his face.

Spencer shrugged, a small blush forming on his cheeks. "A thank you, I guess."

"You should thank me more often, Doctor Reid," Emily whispered teasingly. 

"I probably should." 

He leaned back towards her, pressing his lips softly against hers. This time the kiss was less desperate, more slow and tantalizing. Spencer moved his hands to the back of her neck, tugging lightly at the shorter strands of hair there. This elicited a small moan from Emily, her mouth opening slightly, though wide enough for Spencer to slip his tongue inside, a moan of his own following his actions. Emily sat up straight, her lips not once leaving Spencer's as she pushed him back into the couch, falling on top of him and straddling his hips. One of Spencer's hands slipped from Emily's lower back, and he reached out, trying to ground himself to something else as she began to trail wet kisses down his neck. Spencer's fingers eventually clasped onto the coffee table beside them, trying to ground himself as he thrust his hips up gently, Emily responding eagerly, sucking on his skin desperately. A gasp escaped his lips as Emily's hands pushed up and under his shirt, her fingers dancing across his bare skin. So caught up in the feeling of Emily all over him, Spencer's hand precariously knocked the mugs sitting on the coffee table over, both falling to the ground and spilling tea all over the carpet. 

The pair startled, jumping apart slightly, though not entirely letting go of each other. Spencer's expression was dazed and guilty as his eyes wondered to the tea stained carpet below them. Emily simply burst out laughing, surprising the both of them. Spencer let a small, uncertain laugh slip past his lips as Emily continued to giggle, her hands still resting against his bare chest. 

"I'm - ah - sorry about that." 

"Don't be," Emily insisted, still grinning. "If that hadn't happened we probably would've had sex right here." 

Spencer's cheeks heated up at that, a choked laugh slipping through his lips that he covered with a cough. "Y-yeah, probably." 

Sensing his discomfort, Emily leaned down, placing a feather light kiss to his lips before jumping to her feet and bending to pick up the mugs. 

"C'mon," she said, turning back to him. "Let's get this cleaned up, and then we can get some sleep." 

Spencer swallowed loudly at that. "W-we?" 

Emily nodded, a pleasant smile dancing on her lips. "Yes, _we_. It's nearly 6a.m., I'm not driving you back home and I'm sure as hell not gonna let you walk."

Spencer obliged, helping her clean up the carpet as much as possible before lacing their fingers together and allowing Emily to lead them upstairs. He found himself curled around her body, his fingers combing through her hair as he breathed in her scent, a content smile taking over his face. This was the kind of thing he had dreamed of; the two of them, lying together at night, just basking in each others comfort. He only hoped that when he woke up the next morning, everything would still be there.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm going to switch back and forth between flash backs and present time (during season 6 - after Emily "dies"), so we'll see how this works out.
> 
> Read & Review please - don't be afraid to leave constructive criticism.


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